ANOTHER LITTLE UPDATE

Hi there. Long time no post eh!! So, what happened since May? 
I went to see the surgeon and they made the decision to do two things - 
They gave me a machine called 'Exogen' - which is an ultrasound bone healing system. There seems to be very little info on line about it, but essentially I had to strap it onto my foot for 20 mins every day for 4 months. Apparently it creates a little vibration in the area where the bone hasnt healed which causes your brain to think that there is healing to be done. So, the nurse who explained it to me said that it was about a 50/50 success rate. They also put me on the surgical list for surgery "if" the Exogen wasnt successful. 

That was May. Roll on to November - and I finished with the machine. 
Unfortunately the pain is still there. In absolute honesty, not quite as bad, but then I manage my pain and my "being on my feet" so well and I usually have to take codeine based pain meds if Ive been on my feet too much. My left foot looks just as pronated as before, which makes me feel sad. In fact both feet still pronate. It would seem that hypermobility doesnt respond too well to extreme surgery. Sigh. 

So, as the Exogen wasnt successful, it seems there will be more surgery. Apparently the waiting list is 15 months, so we are looking at next August-ish. Thats fine. Im working on losing as much weight as possible so that that doesnt hinder me. 

I have to be honest - if I was to be asked would I get the surgeries again - my answer would be - yes, without a shadow of a doubt. My right foot is as good as its going to be, and works without pain. The left foot - well, its a blip and I have no doubt that it will get better. 

It is a long and quite frankly frustrating journey - but if you know about the pain of PTTD you know that that pain is horrendous, and arent we lucky that we can have corrective surgery, even if it leaves us with about 80% better feet. 

9 MONTHS POST OP

How time flies. 
So, Foot is OK, but, there is a problem which I still havent gotten to the bottom of. 

As I stated in my last update, the MRI showed a bit of a problem with the area around the cotton osteotomy - ie, side of the foot where he put a bone graft in to create more of an arch. 

Having seen him, I now understand more of what the report meant. Bottom line, there is incomplete healing in the bone. 

Now, what he said was - the MRI can be a bit too sensitive, so, he referred me to have a C.A.T. scan. Ive had that done, and now wait to see him again - on the 22nd of this month. He did say that if the C.A.T. scan confirmed what the MRI was showing - ie, that the bone hadnt healed, then basically it wouldnt heal and I would have to have more surgery to correct it. As much as I dont want more surgery, to be totally honest, if that is what is needed to get rid of this awful pain, then so be it. I can only describe the pain as a sudden stabbing pain, that literally takes my breath away. Thankfully, it doesnt last all the time, but if I have been doing a lot, I end up with a lot of pain. So, I would really like to get to the bottom of it. I notice now that my right foot is great. Gets a bit achey, but thats ok. Its expected. I havent been able to strengthen it up because of the other foot. 

I have to say, I cannot wait until I can walk comfortably again for enjoyment. Im so sick of knowing that any amount of walking is going to cause the pain. 

I will report back on how the appointment goes. Will be interested to see. 

5 MONTH POST OP REPORT!

Thought it was about time that I updated. Anyone who has had this surgery done will know that its a lot of "no news" at this stage, hence the lack of posting. 

I had the MRI done to check out what was causing the pain that I was experiencing. Although I still havent had an appointment with the consultant about the results, when I attended the physiotherapist last week, she was able to give me a bit if info. 

First of all I will do as I did before!! A few bulletpoints! 

• Im going to talk in terms of months now rather than weeks - so we are at 5 months post op. 
• Ive had 3 physio appointments so far since the last post. Im not sure if she or I can see much improvement but I will be totally honest. Im fairly shite at doing my physio. Yes, Im ashamed to say that. You'd think being in pain would make me more focused on doing it, but heres the thing - it freaking hurts. She has urged me strongly to do more pool work - ie non weight bearing - which makes sense as I AM overweight - (something which she pointed out to me at our last session - no shit sherlock). I know for a fact that my weight doesnt help my feet - but I am making a good effort to lose the weight, and have told her this. I seem to get a lot of pain in my big toe when doing tippy toe exercises... and just the whole foot and leg feels so weak. 
• The nervy feeling has really abated thank goodness. I now sleep sockless, and it really doesnt bother me. Its not totally free of the nervy sensation but it really is more than bearable. 
• The foot still looks like it has "fallen" in. What was I expecting? Beautiful arched feet? Well, quite frankly yes.... I still look like I have flat feet, which makes me feel sad, but on the other hand, going by my right foot (Feb 2015 so nearly 2 years on), although I havent got beautiful feet, it will give me back a quality of mostly pain free life that I havent had for at least 5 years. 
• The physio told me that the MRI results show a lot of swelling in the marrow of the bone that had the surgery done, and went on to tell me that in all fairness, Im not even half way through healing yet. It may all look fine and dandy on the outside, but there is still a lot of healing going on in the inside. She gave out to me for doing too much, but lordy, its difficult not to. Too much is doing a supermarket shop and tidying around my small house - then Ive over done it... thats what doing too much is. It is so very frustrating. At this stage, expectations from everyone, including myself are high - too high. 

Here are a few pictures to show what I mean. 

front view

See! Not a pretty foot!!! 

Tendon transfer site - Really great healing though - you can barely see the scar! 

So you can see - the tendon from the big toe joint looks a bit odd. 

Calcaneal Osteotomy site scar. 

As you can see - they still look pronated, but the left one looks worse. 

• Am I happy so far?? Yes, definitely. I am very lucky that I have the time and space into healing. I really dont know what I would have done if I had had to go back to work. 

If you have ANY questions please do not hesitate to contact me. Leave a message and I will try and answer as best as possible. 

WEEK 14/15 of PTTD recovery!!!

Hi there. So, its about 4 weeks since I posted. Apologies but thanks to a little reminder on Insta!! 

So, having just passed week 14, how am I doing? 

• I went back to see my consultant at week 12. Unfortunately he was actually off for 2 weeks, and because I had/have been having problems with the tendon area, so the surgeon from the surgical team decided to ask me to come back in 2 weeks to see the main man. 
• This I did on the Wed just passed, and to cut a long story short, the "hardware", ie, the pins etc are all looking fine on the x-ray, but there is concern with the pain I am having in my tendon area, so he has referred me for an MRI. That hopefully will be in the next few weeks. I was a little bit confused tbh, as they sent me down to physio before I went, and they have advised that I start to go without the boot - wean myself off it she said. Now, they have also said to go easy until they know what is going on with the tendon. Hand on heart, the pain is the same burning searing pain that I was having pre surgery. The thing is, I can actually compare, as having had the other foot done, I know that I didnt have the same pain. In fact, I never had any awful pain in the tendon. Only a bit after doing physio. This pain is one that has actually got me back taking codeine - which as I said before, I am very wary of. But Im being careful about how much Im taking. Bit depressing to be honest, but you know, what will be will be and absolutely nothing I can do at the moment, apart from following what Ive been told. 
• The foot looks great. But OMG, the nervy sensations around the cotton osteotomy is horrible. I know it will die down, but I am still wearing a soft sock all the time - day and night. Cant bear the feel of anything touching it. 
• The part on the bottom of my heel where the pins are gets a bit tingly, but in a different way - like the nerves are attaching. I can deal with that. 
• I know all this sounds a bit depressing and to be honest, Im in that horrible zone where all the surgical stuff is healed, but now, its about building up the strength in the foot. Because of the tendon pain, its dragging a bit. I feel the foot has fallen in a bit. Makes me feel a bit sad tbh. Its like, what next. Am I going to be in pain forever. Oh I just dont know. I remember, and after reading back over the last blog, I know that it was a tough time then. That gives me a bit of relief. 
• I am driving again - the past 3 weeks? Oh the sense of freedom. Its blooming fantastic. Being able to just go out the door and nip to the shop. Priceless. (have an automatic car so no need to use the left foot!!). 
• Im really set on working on my weight now. I know full well that its going to help take some pressure off my feet. I cant wait to be able to get back swimming. Just looking forward to being weightless in the pool!!! 

So, there are some bulletpoints of what is going on at this stage. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask. Especially if you think there is something Ive missed!!! 

I really appreciate knowing that this stuff is helping some of you out there. I know it sounds a bit negative but again I say, Im still 100% happy that Ive had it done. 

WEEK 10

So, heading into week 10. 

Heres where Im at. 

• I am putting more and more weight on my foot - with and without boot. Is that ok? Im really not sure. I have another 2 weeks til I go back for checkup, but I do tend to go with one crutch around the kitchen for instance, as it frees me up to do more. I attempted a supermarket shop the other day without my scooter, and was in AGONY. 
• The scars are all healing up beautifully! Ive still a lot of dry and flaking skin on the foot, but rubbing lots of super thick cocoa butter cream in. 
• I have to wear a VERY soft sock all the time. I have the same issue with the top of the foot as the last time - nerve damage. My right foot still has massive sensitivity so I suspect that it, and my left foot will not recover from that. But it is bearable. 
• I can see that the foot looks to be a lovely shape, even though it already seems to be pronating a bit again - but so did the other one - seems that although I have had the surgery, I still have the genetics to pronate. Yay.... not...... trouble with that is that Im terrified that the feet will fall in again. Ive been assured that this wont happen, but....
• I WANT TO BE DRIVING AGAIN. I feel so so housebound. I want to have more mobility, more independence, more freedom. Hopefully not too long now?? 
• Im terrified as to what the future holds for me. For so long it was all about waiting for the surgery, but now, Im on the road to where??? 

So, there you go. Not lots of things, but at this stage, there just isnt much to say - its really the same things over and over. 

I will check back in after the 26th - my next appointment with the surgeon. Hopefully moving into a shoe, and starting physio. 

FRUSTRATION

Just a quick check in. 
So, its a week since I got my Aircast boot. How has that been? Well, after the first day, it has become easier to get around - to a certain extent. It is easier to get around, but on the back of that, I have started to really suffer with bad hip pain. I feel the strain on my hips and lower back a bit hellish. I get up in the morning, and feel okish. I go downstairs and start pottering on my knee scooter, but within an hour, my hips are killing me. I suppose that is the time to STOP, and rest. Unfortunately with my partner in work and my daughter in school, a lot of the time I cant stop. 
I feel so very frustrated. Frustrated about what I cannot do, and what the other members of the household are not doing that I "expect" them to do. The trouble is, at this stage, if I ask for things to be done, they are being done with an element of resentment. I notice the little things, but either they dont or they choose not to. Go figure. Then, if I ask or point something out, Im "nagging"... it breaks my heart, both that Im accused of this horrible word, and that I have to. 
So, frustration plays a big part in the healing process. Frustration at myself for what I cannot do, frustration at what isnt being done which is fairly obvious to me but not to others in the household - (example - a vase of dead flowers on the table), and then the frustration at the pain. 

The thing is, I know that all this will pass. I know that in another 6ish weeks Im going to be able to get around a bit easier, so Ive just got to have patience. I mean deep breaths patience. But how do I encourage patience in those around me?? 

Ok, so Im going to write this now while Im "in the moment".... 

I am just back from having my cast removed. Taking into account it is a 2 hour drive there and back to the hospital, I have to say I am utterly exhausted. And in pain, and, well, yes, both of those things. 

On the upside, the surgeon (or should I say one of his surgical team, as he wasnt in today) said the xray looked great, and the wounds are healing brilliantly. I was really happy to hear this, as I kept having this sensation around the tibial tendon area that the wound was being rubbed - it wasnt. 

If you are waiting on this surgery, be prepared for when the cast comes off - its not a pretty sight!!! Hairy legs, dry skin, red tinges all over the foot... yes, I wont be entering a foot modelling competition any time soon. Also another good tip is to bring a long knee high sock with you to put on before you put the boot on. I am very proud of myself that I remembered!!! 

So, the boot. It does put your foot into a very different position, and this causes weird pains that you didnt or havent had for the past 6 weeks. I remember now that the foot DOES NOT LIKE CHANGE!!! It will fight, and the fight is vocalised with pain, so be prepared. 

Im home now, with the boot off, and the foot just lying there in its long sock. Im very nervous about moving it, and it is very sensitive. The doc said I can sleep without the boot, but funnily enough, Im quite nervous about the prospect tonight, so I will see later. 

Ive taken brufen and paracetamol. I was tempted to take a codipar earlier, but Im going to try and hold off. I really havent the energy to fight even a slight codeine withdrawal. 

So, going forward, I am back to outpatients in 6 weeks. I am PWB (partial weight bearing) until then - and have to go by pain levels as to how much to do. I do remember that part, and its all about not pushing past a certain pain level. I know from reading back from last surgery that it will probably take a few days for the foot to get used to having the boot on. So its a bit of patience from now. 

As you can see, the foot looks really good, and healing so well. Im delighted. It will take some soaking and exfoliating to get the dry skin off, but it will be nice in the process!!! 

I'll be back in a few days to report on how Im doing. 

Take care any fellow PTTD'ers!!!